Interview with an Artist's Model

Woody is a professional, nude artist's model who works exclusively in my studio. With finely, chiselled features and a natural talent for not speaking and remaining motionless I thought it was time to ask the tough questions...

TET: So how did you get the name 'Woody'?
Woody: In a spontaneous lack of creativity, you gave me that name knowing full well that the opportunities for inuendo would make this interview so much easier to write.

TET: Hmmm...well it seemed like a good idea at the time but now I'm not so sure. How is life as a eunuch?
Woody: Would you get your head out from between my legs and ask some real questions!

TET: Okay...What's it like being an artist's model?
Woody: It's actually quite demanding. I have my limbs twisted every which way and then I have to hold a pose sometimes for hours, even days.

TET: Would you compare it to a kind of performance?
Woody: I guess, in a way. You do have to 'feel' the pose in order to bring life to it.
TET: Have you ever given a wooden performance?
Woody: ...!
TET: Sorry - couldn't resist.

TET: Obviously most of your work is nude work, are you comfortable exposing your body?
Woody: I'm made of wood with ambiguous sexuallity what is there to cover up? Actually I'd feel a little weird if you started putting clothes on thing we'd be having tea parties with your collection of stuffed toys and GI Joes...
TET: *coughing* um...well I don't think we'd be having tea parties...

TET: What do you do when you're not modelling?
Woody: Mostly I just sit around doing not much of anything.
TET: Deadwood?
Woody: Twit!

TET: Talk about wood turning!

....okay, so obviously this is a one joke idea dragged out into some really corny humour but at least I had fun creating the photos and I got to tell my joke. Normal, high quality blog writing will resume as soon as not adjust your connection!


  1. Good photos! I was thinking it was the larger size at first until I realised!

    Not bad 'wood' jokes. Ask him if he has met WOODY Allen...or Edward WOODward...or WOODY WOOD Pecker! (LOL!!)

  2. Perhaps he's friends with Woody and Buzz? :-) Very creative.


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