Interview with an Artist's Model

Woody is a professional, nude artist's model who works exclusively in my studio. With finely, chiselled features and a natural talent for not speaking and remaining motionless I thought it was time to ask the tough questions...

TET: So how did you get the name 'Woody'?
Woody: In a spontaneous lack of creativity, you gave me that name knowing full well that the opportunities for inuendo would make this interview so much easier to write.

TET: Hmmm...well it seemed like a good idea at the time but now I'm not so sure. How is life as a eunuch?
Woody: Would you get your head out from between my legs and ask some real questions!

TET: Okay...What's it like being an artist's model?
Woody: It's actually quite demanding. I have my limbs twisted every which way and then I have to hold a pose sometimes for hours, even days.

TET: Would you compare it to a kind of performance?
Woody: I guess, in a way. You do have to 'feel' the pose in order to bring life to it.
TET: Have you ever given a wooden performance?
Woody: ...!
TET: Sorry - couldn't resist.

TET: Obviously most of your work is nude work, are you comfortable exposing your body?
Woody: I'm made of wood with ambiguous sexuallity what is there to cover up? Actually I'd feel a little weird if you started putting clothes on me...next thing we'd be having tea parties with your collection of stuffed toys and GI Joes...
TET: *coughing* um...well I don't think we'd be having tea parties...

TET: What do you do when you're not modelling?
Woody: Mostly I just sit around doing not much of anything.
TET: Deadwood?
Woody: Twit!

TET: Talk about wood turning!

....okay, so obviously this is a one joke idea dragged out into some really corny humour but at least I had fun creating the photos and I got to tell my joke. Normal, high quality blog writing will resume as soon as possible....do not adjust your connection!

2 comments:

  1. Good photos! I was thinking it was the larger size at first until I realised!

    Not bad 'wood' jokes. Ask him if he has met WOODY Allen...or Edward WOODward...or WOODY WOOD Pecker! (LOL!!)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Perhaps he's friends with Woody and Buzz? :-) Very creative.

    ReplyDelete

Comments not directly related to the post will be deleted. This includes spammy generic comments with links to websites not related to the post.

Related Posts with Thumbnails