Women Growing Beards - When did that become a thing?

Thorin never knew just how wrong he could be!
WARNING: This article is not about what you're thinking. For only the second time since I started writing this blog you're about to read about 'Lady Parts'. If you're interested, read my other article, The Female Orgasm Explained. You have been warned!

I'm subscribed to the Australian site MamaMia, which is basically the online version of a Women's Opinion Magazine but with a more diverse range of topics. I'm one of the 'occasional blokes' who reads the odd article that catches my attention. So when I see a headline like Why all women should grow a beard at least once, how can I not read it?

Now, if the article had been about women actually growing beards, that may have been interesting for the social/cultural implications but it was actually about all women growing out their pubic hair at least once in their life instead of going bald down there. When did growing pubes become a thing instead of just something that happens to you?

The article's author, twenty-something, Laura Cordero, apparently has been removing her pubic hair since the first once dared to appear and, until now, had never let her, 'beard' (her term) grow out. OMG!

OMG because she described it as a beard and now I'm imagining vaginas with little eyes and a nose above their cute bushy beards... and... when did 'bald' become the norm, and why, in this day and age, are men (in her article) getting blamed for the bald vagina?

Just as a footnote - yes I said 'vagina' and not 'vulva' (for anyone that just happened to read the numerous corrections in the original article's comments by anatomy nerds). Get over yourselves. The mainstream uses vagina as a generic term for that entire region. You know it, I know it. Vulva is obsolete to all but doctors, anatomists and other people that like to scoff at mainstream ignorance.

First, feminism happened long before bald vaginas became a thing. If there's one thing that women have full control over it's to go bald or not. Sure there are guys (or girls depending on your preference in partners) that prefer bald but really, there are people who prefer blondes, Asians, big eyes, long legs etc. etc. you are not a menu made up of what other people prefer. Do what you prefer for yourself.

Maybe porn popularized the bald look but I have a sneaking suspicion the beauty industry perpetuated it as another service they could charge people for - more than it being a male preference. Most men, I imagine, couldn't care less and those who do, probably use a lot of 'product' and may even be bald down there themselves.

That said, in a week where Australian Journalist, Tracey Spicer gives a TED talk bitching about how long women spend on their daily beauty routine, growing your public hair is surely a no brainer for saving just a little bit of time? Who's going to know at the office or any other place of business where keeping your clothes on is a requirement?

Until I read Laura's article it never occurred to me that a shaved or unshaved vag was a criteria that some people have for what they like in a partner? I've personally never met any woman and wondered if she was bald down there. (Too busy reminding myself that those aren't her eyes and I should probably look a bit higher - I don't get out much!)

But what's even more surprising to me is that 'hairy' is now a thing and 'bald' seems to be the norm? Surely that's a product of Generation Y on-wards, who've been told they can be or do anything they want by Gen X'ers? Apparently they've embraced bald.

I once heard a Big Brother contestant complain about how a hairy vagina was gross and thought she was the vain exception not the rule. I'd like to say 'who would have thought?' but honestly how a women's magazine can write a whole article on whether or not to grow out your pubic hair is beyond me?

I'm also wondering if Laura, who professed that beards weren't for her, would grow hers back if some guy said beards were sexy? Maybe she should discuss it with Cameron Diaz, who's all in favour of pubes - apparently.

Such a dilemma!

6 comments:

  1. You probably thought I wouldn't be commenting on this - neither did I - but I found that I'd just like to make a couple of comments.

    It would seem that, by my experience that a few years after menopause, and going through 'the change of life' you don't get anymore hair, so the decision will be taken away from you. The hair is there just like the underarm hair and the eyebrows, to stop perspiration running down, hence the need to keep up with personal hygiene (not sure of spelling) in this area. Don't know why your body thinks you don't need it after this, but it's to do with having lesser hormones or estrogen etc.

    I don't get underarm hair anymore, which is great, as, though I never had much, I still used to remove it for when wearing sleeveless things, as it looked better, but didn't soak any perspiration up, which was its job.

    That's my take on it. Couldn't have been bothered with the other, didn't think it looked right anyway, but no choice now. (this might have been a secret not known to males about older women who have gone through the menopause)

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    1. I wish the male body would do the same thing with ear and nose hair (decide you don't need it). Unfortunately the older a guy gets the more you seem to grow ear and nose hair.

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  2. It's probably to keep the dust out! You can use a trimmer if you aren't already. Glad I don't have this problem. What women do get in mature years though, is a fine down on the sides of the face and chin, a bit like the fine fuzz on a peach. That's to do with hormones I think. You can use a depilarotory cream, or however you spell it, or a small shaver. I've got a pen-shaped one that I use, it's like a small tapered comb. You just use it dry. Trouble is, usually the more you shave hair, the more it grows back. Does a reasonable job every now and again though.

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  3. LOLOLOL. Somehow I've just randomly come across this article after googling myself.

    I love the image of a vagina with eyes and nose and mouth and 'beard'. I thought the term was pretty funny and really only wrote it for the laughs (a few of which I got but mostly snarky remarks about comparing lady bits to manliness - good grief - I love the keyboard warriors).

    To answer your question: would I grow it back if a guy liked it? Nope. I do it all for myself. But yes, sadly, bald is the norm (according to my gen y friends anyway) - and most likely perpetuated by the porn industry. HOWEVER, pubic hair IS coming back in fashion. Albeit, trimmed. And this is my favoured style now.

    Leave the hair around the top part, groom the sides (down near the outer labia).

    Thanks for this blog! Loved it, and the lols. Also if Cameron Diaz wants to holla at me, I won't complain! haha

    Laura

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    1. Also would like to add, most of the men I personally asked while researching the article (also most of the men I have been friends with through life) have professed to preferring trimmed or bald :/ *sigh*. these would be ages ranging from 14 (when I was young too!) to 28 (my current age) and across many different social backgrounds and countries. Although I will admit, Melbourne men seem to be the most easy going when it comes to having hair down there (at least the ones I know). Queenslanders on the other hand... they're all for the hair removal!

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    2. Thanks for stopping by Laura. It's rare that I get actual authors of articles I'm commenting upon stopping by. Glad you got a laugh or two. I think my question about your pubes was rhetorical for effect - I don't think I actually wanted to know, at least not in that much detail 'cause now I'm basically picturing your manicured beard when I should be looking at your eyes ;-)

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