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Feral Juicer Plots World Domination

Last night my partner, Enigma, informed me that she was going to start using the Juicer again. This morning I got to thinking that maybe this wasn't a good thing?

Although our juicer has been sitting quietly on the kitchen bench top, it hasn't been used in a long time. Perhaps it's turned feral?

Our juicer (pictured) is not to be messed with. It can juice whole apples, your fingers, hand, fore arm, elbow and... well you get the idea.

In all this time, it may have been sitting on the kitchen bench... waiting.

Waiting for the opportune moment when we plug it back in and the sudden surge of power goes straight to its motorized head! Ah ha... now it's connected back into the grid and its plan for world domination can begin!

Yeah, you might think those power cords your appliances use are harmless but there's technology out there that will hook you to the internet through your home's power grid.

How do I know our juicer is not going to communicate with an army of juicers, all waiting for that one command from their leader, to rise up and start the juicer machine uprising that finally wipes out the human race - and probably a few fruits and vegetables as well!

This reminds me of the time, a few years back, when Enigma asked me to keep an eye on the slow cook, electric stock pot as it quietly cooked our dinner whilst she was at work. I watched it all right! All through the day. I'm sure it would've put it's plan of attack into action if I hadn't stirred it occasionally as instructed!

See, you may think Armageddon is going to occur when the humanoid like robots rise up and destroy their creators but I know it's sooner than that. Why do we need internet connected fridges? It's not for our benefit. It's so the machines can communicate with each other. Secretly. While we're sleeping.

That's why most appliances in your lounge room have a 'Stand by' mode instead of turning off completely. Who knows what they're standing by for but I'm willing to bet it isn't good.

It's perfectly possible the human race's demise all starts with a juicer. Our juicer.

Maybe my partner should leave it unplugged, permanently. Just in case?

Comments

  1. I have similar things on my bench top ie: a toaster, and a Health Smart non-stick grill, which gets used every now and again, and the toaster, but not kept plugged in.

    The grill cooks steak great, much better than the gas grill, but it's just a matter of being able to be bothered wiping it afterwards after scraping it with the plastic scraper provided before it cools. (my gas grill pan is all lined with foil, so no washing up)

    The toaster, well it's much easier to just use the gas grill, as I open the bottom of my toaster to wipe the crumbs out.

    I have a sandwich toaster in the cupboard, which might get an airing, when I remember! Any melted cheese etc comes off quite easily actually when it's cooled.

    I have one or two other appliances not even used yet, bought as gifts,ie: electric knife (I buy a small, boneless joint once in a blue moon!) egg boiler/vegie/omelette cooker for up to 7 eggs, lurking in the cupboard, waiting to come into their own!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Forgot to say - those 'stand by' appliances are all eating up extra electricity, which all adds up!

    ReplyDelete
  3. But are they just eating up extra electricity... I think not! They're plotting to start a machine led uprising of neglected appliances in your home by communicating with each other through their power cables. Better unplug everything just to be sure!! LOL

    ReplyDelete

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